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| Kranzool Nijibouhouti Purveyor of fine dry goods |
On Clothing and Other Wares
by Kranzool Nijibouhouti
Hello wonderful people! I have traveled far and wide to bring you the best goods from lands FAR AWAY! See my leather hat? Made by a toothless, fingerless, mute eunuch in deepest jungles of Bhawatiki! Priceless indeed and I dare to wear it on my oily head!
But now I bring to you items which are not quite so priceless, but which I would wear on my oily head nonetheless! I have searched far and wide for apparel, beverage holders, and computer accessories to match the fine quality goods you are about to see, but I will tell you what! It cannot be done! May lightning strike me, Mr. Kranzool Nijibouhouti, purveyor of fine dry goods from the most remote sections of the UNIVERSE, if there are products as wonderful as these.
It was on my most recent expedition to Troy, NY that I stumbled across these veritable paragons of improvisational comedy known as Sheer Idiocy. I practically laughed my oily leather hat off! When it came time for me to leave, I begged them to allow me to take a souvenir of my experiences. They tried to make a human offering to me, but I refused! They then decided to craft a special set of wares expressly for me and me alone. And now I offer to you, special replicas of those wares straight from my finest factories!
| First I bring you this fine garment made from quality cotton and inks. It depicts the Idiothead God in his sheep-form, frolicking in a sunny field and looking most overjoyed. |  |
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| The same scene, minus the breathtaking colors has been inscribed upon drinking vessels, capable of holding large quantities of your favorite beverage. |   |
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| The Idiothead appears once again, waiting for your mouse to glide over the wonderful pastoral scene! |  |
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