Idiot from: Fall 2001 to Spring 2005
floating down the river, as fish often do, nate realized one day that his life wasn't complete. luckily, being made out of wood, he had the blue fairy to fall back on. so he wished to himself outloud that they might encounter each other, which they did. "blue fairy," he said, "i want to be a real boy." to which she replied "if i can do it for pinocchio, i can do it for you.", which she did.
after becomming a real boy, nate realized it wasn't all it was cracked up to be. so he wished to himself outloud that he might encounter the blue fairy again, which he did. "blue fairy, i've decided that i prefer being a wooden fish to being a boy" said nate, to which she replied "tough coconuts; i don't have a licence to turn boys into wooden things. only the other way around. now, you caught me as i was about to hop a train to detroit, so i really must be going." which she did.
deciding that life was unbearable not being a wooden fish, nate decided to study hard in school, and go to college, and major in electrical engineering and aeronautical engineering, so he could get the education he would need to invent a device to turn him back into a wooden fish. which he did. after entering college, he realized that he was flawed in his thinking; his destiny was not to become a wooden fish. it was to join sheer idiocy. which he did.
having mended his ways, he decided to write this comprehensive biography, and force you to read every last word of it. which you did.
that young fish was me, nate, the idiot formally know as "jonbragg".